Best 760 Communication Jokes and Puns

Talking to a liberal is like trying to explain social media to a 70 years old.

Talking to a liberal is like trying to explain social media to a 70 years old.

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How did the medical community come up with the term "PMS"?

How did the medical community come up with the term "PMS"? "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken.

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More jokes about: #Sexist jokes
There's an Irishman, a homosexual, and a Jew standing at a bar.

There's an Irishman, a homosexual, and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community.

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A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up.

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, 'Dad'. With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands.

Dear, Dad. It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mum and you.

I've been finding real passion with Stacy. She is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing's, tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am.

But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so that Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your many grandchildren.

Love, your son, Joshua.

P.S . Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Jason's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on the kitchen table. Call when it is safe for me to come home!

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More jokes about: #Funny
Don't spell part backwards.

Don't spell part backwards. It's a trap.

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More jokes about: #One #Liner #Communication #Puns
A father passing by his son's bedroom, was astonished to see the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up.

A father passing by his son's bedroom, was astonished to see the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, "Dad." With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands... "Dear, Dad. It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mum and you. I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her because of her piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am. But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it! Don't worry, Dad. I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to know your many grandchildren. Love, your son, Joshua.P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Jason's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on the kitchen table. Call when it is safe for me to come home!

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More jokes about: #Popular jokes
What do you call a bunch of black people in an elevator?

What do you call a bunch of black people in an elevator? A box of chocolate.

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"Doctor, there's a patient on line 1 that says he's invisible."

"Doctor, there's a patient on line 1 that says he's invisible."

"Well, tell him I can't see him right now."

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More jokes about: #One #Liner #Communication #Doctor #Puns
I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldn't complain.

I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldn't complain.

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If pronouncing my b's as v's makes me sound Russian, then soviet.

If pronouncing my b's as v's makes me sound Russian, then soviet.

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More jokes about: #One #Liner #Communication #Racist
Mother: "Are you talking back to me?!"

Mother: "Are you talking back to me?!"Son: "Well yeah, that's kinda how communication works."

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More jokes about: #Popular jokes
After the helicopter crash, the blond pilot was asked what happened.

After the helicopter crash, the blond pilot was asked what happened. She replied, It was getting chilly in there, so I turned the fan off.

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My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer.

My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, No, wait! I can change.

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More jokes about: #One #Liner #Communication #Love #Puns
Why men's voice is louder than women?

Why men's voice is louder than women? Men have an antenna.

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Know what the hardest part of riding a scooter is?

Know what the hardest part of riding a scooter is? Telling your parents you're gay.

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A mexican magician was doing a magic trick.

A mexican magician was doing a magic trick. He said, Uno, Dose, and he disappeared without a trace.

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More jokes about: #One #Liner #Communication #Puns #Racist
My girlfriend is always stealing my t-shirts and sweaters...

My girlfriend is always stealing my t-shirts and sweaters... But if I take one of her dresses, suddenly we need to talk.

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Before I criticize a man, I like to walk a mile in his shoes.

Before I criticize a man, I like to walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when I do criticize him, I'm a mile away and I have his shoes.

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I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas.

I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas. She told me Nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace So I bought her nothing.

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I just asked my husband if he remembers what today is... Scaring men is easy.

I just asked my husband if he remembers what today is... Scaring men is easy.

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