Best 90 Creator Jokes and Puns

Josey wasn't the best pupil at Sunday school.

Josey wasn't the best pupil at Sunday school. She often fell asleep and one day while she was sleeping, the teacher asked her a question. "Who is the creator of the universe?" Joe was sitting next to Josey and decided to poke her with a pin to wake her up. Josey jumped and yelled, "God almighty!" The teacher congratulated her. A little later the teacher asked her another question, "Tell me who is our lord and savior?" Joe poked Josey again and she yelled out, "Jesus Christ!" The teacher congratulated her again. Later on the teacher asked, "What did Eve say to Adam after their 26th child?" Joe poked Josey again and she shouted, "If you stick that thing in me again, I'll snap it in half and stick it up your ass!"

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Dear Tech Support:

Dear Tech Support:Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6.I can''t seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!Thanks,Troubled UserDear Troubled User:This is a very common problem that men complain about.Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5, and Do Bills 4.2. However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0!WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!Best of luck,Tech Support

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Yet again one of my jokes was freaking stolen by a stupid bastard that just re-worded it to make it seem like it was theirs but it's very obvious that it's been stolen.

Yet again one of my jokes was freaking stolen by a stupid bastard that just re-worded it to make it seem like it was theirs but it's very obvious that it's been stolen.

To the person who typed THIS:

'An police officer pulls a car over and said, sir you have won a $300 reward for winning a driving the safest contest. The officer asked the driver, sir what are you going to don with the money. The driver replies I will go get my drivers license. Then his wife in the passenger seat jumps into the comversation and said that my husband is a bit stupid when he's drunk officer. Then a guy wakes up in the back seat and yells I knew we were not going far with this stolen car. Then there was a thump in the trunk and a voice said have crossed the border yet.'

Please, if you see this joke, vote LAME. It was stolen. I am the creator of the one where they win $1000, it's pretty obvious it was stolen. Mine was done ages ago, but this was done a few days ago.

Thanks bastard.

Sincerely,

A very pissed person.

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The problem with Iron Fist...

The problem with Iron Fist...

The problem with Netflix's Iron Fist show is pretty simple.See, Marvel is trying to be diverse not just in front of the camera, but behind it. They want to really show respect for the communities their characters are drawn from.So Jessica Jones is a woman, and they made an effort to ... read more

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More jokes about: #Creator #Rand
Did you hear the creator of spaghetti died?.

Did you hear the creator of spaghetti died?.

He pasta way

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Daedalus and the Labyrinth.

Daedalus and the Labyrinth.

Daedalus, the famous Greek architect and inventor, was relaxing in his home in the Blessed Isles of the Underworld when Hades, the Lord of Death himself, came to him with a favor."Listen, Daedalus," Hades began. "You know how the population of the dead here increase every year? The Underworl... read more

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More jokes about: #Creator #Hades #Computer #Science
So a wooden doll becomes sentient.

So a wooden doll becomes sentient.

A wooden doll becomes sentient and goes about it's life. After some time of adjusting to life, he finds out that his creator had died of a heart attack. He promised to attend the funeral, which was going to start at 9am the next day. He wakes up, gets ready, and halfway through the ceremony, he real... read more

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The creator of the USB flash drive died today.

The creator of the USB flash drive died today.

He was lowered into his coffin, flipped over, and then lowered again.

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Henry Heimlich, the creator of the Heimlich maneuver, was getting frustrated.

Henry Heimlich, the creator of the Heimlich maneuver, was getting frustrated.

he prince made a similar gesture, but again Heimlich ignored him.

This continued with a duke, a Duchess, and an Earl. Every time, Heimlich continued on without giving them another thought.

Late in the evening, Heimlich saw a poor farmer who was holding his throat. He rushed over to him and performed his famous life-saving maneuver. A piece of bread flew from the farmer’s mouth, and he begin gasping for breath.

All of the people were amazed. A small boy walked up to him and said, “Mr. Heimlich, you ignored the queen when she pretended to be choking. You also ignored the prince, the duke, the Duchess, and the Earl. How did you know that the farmer actually needed your help?” Henry Heimlich looked down at him and smiled. “The real choke is always in the commons,” he said.

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Susan at Bible Shool.

Susan at Bible Shool.

d off, and when the teacher asked her, "Who is the Son of God?" The boy next to her poked her with a pencil. She immediately woke up and exclaimed, "Jesus Christ!". After this she nodded off again and the teacher called on her again, "Susan, who is the creator of the universe?" The boy poked her again with the pencil, awakening flustered and rather angry, she spoke softly, growing gradually louder, "Oh, my, God!" Again she falls asleep when the teacher asks one final question, "Susan, what did Eve say to Adam after their 56th child?" The boy once more prodded her with his pencil and she screams, "IF YOU POKE ME WITH THAT THING ONE MORE TIME, I WILL SNAP IT IN HALF!!!"

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An old Jewish man dies and goes to haven.

An old Jewish man dies and goes to haven.

An angel informs him that all those who lived a long and virtuous life and still believe in the creator get an audience with the Heavenly Father himself. The man proudly says “I do” and he gets to meet God for 5 minutes.He does not want to God to hear the same tired questions that he is sur... read more

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Kickass if you think that when a new joke comes onto the website that the creators press kickass to make people like it.

Kickass if you think that when a new joke comes onto the website that the creators press kickass to make people like it.

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When they buried the creator of Tetris...

When they buried the creator of Tetris...

The whole cemetery disappeared

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The creator of the hokey pokey died this week.

The creator of the hokey pokey died this week.

It was tough for his friends and family. It was especially tough when laying his body in the coffin. They put his left arm in...

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If we really live in a simulation, then the creator must hate tropical areas a lot.

If we really live in a simulation, then the creator must hate tropical areas a lot.

Because there are too many bugs

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More jokes about: #Creator #Simulation
Breaking news: Creator of adobe flash player just died.

Breaking news: Creator of adobe flash player just died.

More updates coming soon.

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Did you hear about the creator of Arm & Hammer?.

Did you hear about the creator of Arm Hammer?.

He used to be armed and hammered, but he really cleaned up his act.

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It was late in the afternoon, and I was putting the final burnishes on a piece of writing that I was feeling pretty good about.

It was late in the afternoon, and I was putting the final burnishes on a piece of writing that I was feeling pretty good about. Yes, okay, it was an e-mail, but it was a clever one and I hated to lose it. My cursor had frozen. I tried to shut the computer down, and it seized up altogether. Unsure of what else to do, I yanked the battery out.Unfortunately, Windows had been in the midst of a delicate and crucial undertaking. The next morning, when I turned my computer back on, it informed me that a file had been corrupted and Windows would not load. This was followed by some mysterious lines of code, which I took to be my computer saying "Serves you right, careless pea brain" in its native tongue. More graciously, it offered to repair itself by using the Windows Setup CD.

I opened the special drawer where I keep CDs that I have no intention of ever using. There was an IKEA how-to CD, which featured young Swedes assembling kitchen cabinets with nothing but a sardine can key and untrammeled wholesomeness. Mostly, there were CDs of music that my friends are always burning for me, unbidden, because they think I'll enjoy them.

But no Windows CD. I was forced to call the computer company's Global Support Center. My call was answered by a woman in some unnamed, far-off land. I find it vexing to make small talk with someone when I don't know what continent they're standing on. Suppose I were to comment on the beautiful weather we've been having when there was a monsoon at the other end of the phone? So I got right to the point.

"My computer is telling me a file is corrupted and it wants to fix itself, but I don't have the Windows Setup CD."

"So you're having a problem with your Windows Setup CD." She had apparently been dozing and, having come to just as the sentence ended, was attempting to cover for her inattention. I recognized the technique from a thousand breakfast conversations.

"We took that rug in weeks ago. Should I call the cleaners?"

"No, thanks. I'm good."

It quickly became clear that the woman was not a computer technician. Her job was to serve as a gatekeeper, a human shield for the techs, who were off in the back room, or possibly another far-off continent, playing cards and burning CDs for their friends. Her sole duty, as far as I could tell, was to raise global stress levels.

To make me disappear, the woman gave me the phone number for Windows' creator, Microsoft. This is like giving someone the phone number for, I don't know, North America. Besides, the CD worked; I just didn't have it. No matter how many times I repeated my story, we came back to the same place. She was unflappable and resolutely polite.

When my voice hit a certain decibel, I was passed along, like a hot, irritable potato, to a technician.

"You don't have the Windows Setup CD, ma'am, because you don't need it," he explained cheerfully. "Windows came preinstalled on your computer!"

"But I do need it."

"Yes, but you don't have it."

We went on like this for a while. Finally, he offered to walk me through the use of a different CD, one that would erase my entire system. "Of course, you'd lose all your e-mail, your documents, your photos." It was like offering to drop a safe on my head to cure my headache. "You might be able to recover them, but it would be expensive." He sounded delighted. "And it's not covered by the warranty!" The safe began to seem like a good idea, provided it was full.

I hung up the phone and drove my computer to a small, friendly repair place I'd heard about. A smart, helpful man dug out a Windows CD and told me it wouldn't be a problem. An hour later, he called to let me know it was ready. I thanked him, and we chatted about the weather, which was the same outside my window as it was outside his.

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What do you call a YouTuber who's really satisfied with life?.

What do you call a YouTuber who's really satisfied with life?.

A content creator

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More jokes about: #Creator #Youtube
The creator of predictive text died today.

The creator of predictive text died today.

His funfair is next monkey

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