You have $500 dollars. Your friend wants to borrow $200 and your girlfriend wants $100

You have $500 dollars. Your friend wants to borrow $200 and your girlfriend wants $100.

What do you have left?$500 and two left on read messages.

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More jokes about: #U #Borrow #Dollars

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My girlfriend borrowed $500 from me. After 3years, when we separated, she returned exactly $500.

My girlfriend borrowed $500 from me. After 3years, when we separated, she returned exactly $500.

Why even bother checking the punchline guys?

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More jokes about: #Borrowed #3years #Separated
My BF husband said he wanted to do me "Greek style...".

My BF husband said he wanted to do me "Greek style...".

so I borrowed a ton of money and then left the union...

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More jokes about: #Borrowed
My girlfriend borrowed 200$ from me when we met. 4 years later, when we broke up, she gave me exactly 200$ back.

My girlfriend borrowed 200$ from me when we met. 4 years later, when we broke up, she gave me exactly 200$ back.

I lost interest in that relationship.

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An old farmer drove to a neighbor's and knocked at the door.

An old farmer drove to a neighbor's and knocked at the door.

oward? Is he here?"

The boy said, "No sir, He went with Mom and Dad."

The rancher stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other, and mumbling to himself.

The boy said, "Is there anything I can do for you? I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can give dad a message."

"Well," said the rancher uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to your Dad. It's about your brother Howard getting my daughter, Suzie, pregnant."

The boy thought for a moment, "You would have to talk to Dad about that. I know he charges $500 for the bull and $50 for the hog, but I don't know how much he charges for Howard."

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An inmate has a week left in prison and offers a female guard $200 for a blowjob.

An inmate has a week left in prison and offers a female guard $200 for a blowjob.

She responds: C'mon now...Don't end your sentence with a proposition!

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More jokes about: #Guard #Proposition
If software developers made cars.

If software developers made cars.

They would cost $500, get 200 miles per gallon, and once a year would explode. Killing everyone inside.

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More jokes about: #Explode #Developers #Gallon