A daughter: Mom stop it, you're not funny

A daughter: Mom stop it, you're not funny. You never make jokes.

Mom: I made you

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Daughter: Mom, I'm pregnant!

Daughter: Mom, I'm pregnant!

Mom: I thought I told you when a guy touches your boobs, say don't, and when he touches you vagina, say stop.

Daughter: But he kept touching both, so it came out,"don't, stop, don't, stop.

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My friends 10 yo daughter made this up while in the elevator today: "Did you know Darth Vader has another daughter?"

My friends 10 yo daughter made this up while in the elevator today: "Did you know Darth Vader has another daughter?".

Mom: "No, who?"

Daughter: "Ella, Ella Vader."

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Three moms are talking and having lunch together...

Three moms are talking and having lunch together...

One mom had black hair, the next was brunette, and the third was blonde.

The black haired mom says "You guys won't believe what I found in my daughters room yesterday. A cigarette! I've never even smoked."

The brunette mom says "You won't believe what I found in *my* daughters room yesterday. Whiskey! I've never even drank."

The blonde mom says "Well guess what I found in *my* daughters room yesterday. A condom! I've never even had sex before."

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A girl was crying bitterly.

A girl was crying bitterly.

Mom: What happened dear?

Daughter: Mom do I look like a wicked witch?

Mom: No!

Daughter: Are my eyes big as toad?

Mom: No!

Daughter: Is my nose flat?

Mom: No baby!

Daughter: Am I fat like a bulldog?

Mom: You have a fine physique, you are a barbie doll!

Daughter: Then why people tell me that you look like your mom?

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Son: Mum stop.

Son: Mum stop. You are not funny. You never make jokes.

Mum: I made you.

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More jokes about: #Funny #Comeback
Three young daughters.

Three young daughters.

The three young daughters were hanging out with their mom. They're 8, 7, and 5. The eldest one asked the mom, "Mom, why is my name Paris?". The mom replied "Oh it's because you were made in Paris honey. We had our honeymoon there". The second one curiously asked the mom "is that why my name is Brooklyn mom? Because you guys were in Brooklyn when I was made?". "Yes honey, that's right. It's a very nice place and your dad is from there". The third child was so overly excited to ask about her name so she yelled "what about me mom?". The mom angrily yelled back "shut your mouth Honda"

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More jokes about: #Curiously #Eldest