A farmer is sitting in his front porch when a kid with a wagon walks by

A farmer is sitting in his front porch when a kid with a wagon walks by.

Kid: Hey old man I seen some buttercups out in one of your fields. Mind if I go down there and make some butter?Farmer: You can't get butter out of a butter cup ya dumb shit. But knock yer self out. Hour later kid comes back with his wagon half full of butter and shows the farmer. ... read more

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Thibodeaux and Pedro playing Golf.

Thibodeaux and Pedro playing Golf.

those buttercups. After a minute, Mother Nature comes by and is appalled at Pedro destroying her buttercups.

"Pedro! What do you think you're doing? Do you have any idea how long it took me to grow those buttercups?"

Pedro stammers out, "I'm ssss sorry Mother Nature. I'm playing golf with Thibodeaux and I lost my ball in the buttercups. As soon as I find my ball I'll replant the buttercups for you."

Mother Nature seems mollified by this. "Ok, but you better hurry and and replant them."

20 minutes of Pedro destroying the buttercup patch and he still can't find his damned ball. And Mother Nature is on her way back through.

"PEDRO!!! What the hell have you done to my buttercups? That's it. No more butter for you. No bread and butter, no buttermilk biscuits, no apple butter! Nothing to have anything to do with butter for the rest of your life!"

Pedro bursts out laughing so hard that tears are rolling down his face.

"Oh, you think that's funny Pedro?"

"Oh no Mother Nature. I love butter. It's... it's just that Thibodeaux done hit his ball into the pussy-willow."

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Playing golf and sliced into a field of buttercups.

Playing golf and sliced into a field of buttercups.

As I was ready to hit I heard a voice that said “don’t hurt any buttercups”I asked “who are you?”“I’m Mother Nature, if you can chip out of this field of buttercups without harming a single one, I will guarantee you have butter everyday for the rest of your life”I responded “... read more

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A farmer and his wife.

A farmer and his wife.

A farmer and his wife are traveling in their one-horse wagon down the road.The horse falters and causes the wagon to jolt. The farmer says, "That's one."The horse falters again and the farmer says, "That's two."The horse falters a third time and the farmer stops the wagon, ge... read more

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A man was out golfing.

A man was out golfing.

He shanked his ball off the tee, When he found it, it was sitting in a patch of butter cups.He lines up to take a swing and hears "don't hit the buttercups" he looks around but see nothing Sets up for another swing " don't hit the buttercups" looks around, he see no one.... read more

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Q: Why did the kid throw the butter out the window?

Q: Why did the kid throw the butter out the window?A: To see the butter fly!

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A farmer gets on a wagon with chicken wire...

A farmer gets on a wagon with chicken wire...

"Why does your wagon have chicken wire?", a man asks.The farmer replies "I'm hunting chickens, so chicken wire will attract them".The man gives him a look and says "that's not how it works."The farmer leaves anyway.He comes back with a wagon full of chickens.T... read more

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