I desperately needed a massive shit on the train today but there were no toilets in sight and none onboard so I just sat there and held it for about 20 minutes

I desperately needed a massive shit on the train today but there were no toilets in sight and none onboard so I just sat there and held it for about 20 minutes.

The woman sitting opposite looked at me in disgust and said, "Is that a poo in your hand?"

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More jokes about: #Train #Minute #Toilet #Onboard #Sight

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*Knock knock* (courtesy of a 9 year old).

*Knock knock* (courtesy of a 9 year old).

Who's there?I eat map.I eat map who?*Queue a disgusted face on my cousin* **YOU EAT YOUR POO!**

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Bully : You’re so disgusting!

Bully : You’re so disgusting!

Girl : B*tch you look like something I drew from my opposite hand.

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Gorgeous Thai in a short skirt...

Gorgeous Thai in a short skirt...

...was sitting opposite me on the bus, and I'm desperately thinking "don't get an erection... don't get an erection..."

but she did.

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The is a strip club opposite a indoor golf club personally this is disgusting what if you go for a nice family night out and look out the window.

The is a strip club opposite a indoor golf club personally this is disgusting what if you go for a nice family night out and look out the window.

And see a bunch of losers playing indoor golf

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A knock knock joke my 7yr old came up with...

A knock knock joke my 7yr old came up with...

My daughter: "Knock Knock.."Me: 'Who's There?"My daughter: "A person who desperately needs a poo"Me: "A person who..."** (At this point she interupts me)**My Daughter: blows a raspberry

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Mirrors are weird. Everybody looks at them differently.

Mirrors are weird. Everybody looks at them differently.

For instance, I look in a mirror, and in my opinion the mirror is the most beautiful thing, but if you looked in it, you'd be disgusted by the sight of pure hideousness.Mirrors are weird.

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