City Planner: this intersection design would result in multiple, severe collisions every day

City Planner: this intersection design would result in multiple, severe collisions every day.

**Hot Wheels Creator:** dope, right?**City Planner:** *[nodding]* super fuckin dope

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A lot of conflict in the Wild West....

A lot of conflict in the Wild West....

....could have been avoided completely if cowboy city planners had just made their towns big enough for everyone.

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My city has been putting in tons of toll booths. Yesterday I had to pay ten cents before they'd let me pass through an intersection!

My city has been putting in tons of toll booths. Yesterday I had to pay ten cents before they'd let me pass through an intersection!.

At least I was able to turn on a dime.

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I saw the chief of a New York City police on the news.

I saw the chief of a New York City police on the news.

I saw the chief of New York City police on the news, he said "We will never forget 9/11" I said "Well I sure fuckin' hope not it's your phone number"

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A man is driving around the city when he comes to a junction where a railroad and the street intersect.

A man is driving around the city when he comes to a junction where a railroad and the street intersect.

e last second.

The train rockets forward. As it gets within a few hundred feet there's the loud sound of an engine revving.

The man is readying to jump out of the way when the train slams on the brakes and begins to slow down, right before it reaches the intersection where the man is standing.

"Look at that," the man says, smiling. "The train stopped for me!

Then he gets hit by a car.

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3 Engineers are discussing what type of engineer God is...

3 Engineers are discussing what type of engineer God is...

Engineer #1 Obviously a Structural Engineer,like me. Look at the skeleton! Its art! Engineer #2 Obviously a Electrical Engineer, like me. Look at the Nervous System! Genius! Engineer #3 He's not a City Planner, like me... You Never put a waste treatment center... read more

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A 65 year old man driving through the city and his car is weaving all over the road. Eventually a cop pulls him over.

A 65 year old man driving through the city and his car is weaving all over the road. Eventually a cop pulls him over.

"Did you know," says the cop, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"

"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the senior. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."

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