Husband (watching a video):

Husband (watching a video):

Don't do it! I swear you gonna regret it for the rest of your life. You stupid idiot! Don't say yes. No! No! NOOO!! Aw dang, he actually did it! What a dumb ass!

Wife: Honey, why you so mad? What'aya watching?

Husband: Our wedding ceremony.

Husband (watching a video) ...

Husband (watching a video):Don't do it! I swear you gonna regret it for the rest of your life. You stupid idiot! Don't say yes. No! No! NOOO!! Aw dang, he actually did it! What a dumb ass!Wife: Honey, why you so mad? What'aya watching?Husband: Our wedding ceremony.

HUSBAND: (watching a video) Don't do it! I swear you gonna regret it for the rest of your life. You stupid idiot! Don't say yes! No! No! NOOO!! Aw dang, he actually did it! What a dumb ass!.

WIFE: Honey, why you so mad? What are you watching?HUSBAND: Our wedding ceremony.

A woman in labour is screaming at her husband.

He says "Hey, don't blame me. I wanted to put it in your ass.""But Nooo, u thought THAT MIGHT HURT!"

Got a tattoo of a digital watch on my wrist.

I regretted it literally one minute later.

A dude suddenly found out that his wife was having an affair..

.. but before he could talk about it with her she suddenly died in a freak accident. As the person with whom she was having the affair was a neighbourhood guy, the husband also invited him at the funeral ceremony.

At the ceremony the husband somehow was in control of himself but the lover was inconsolable and finally broke down completely. The husband could not contain himself any further, he went to the guy, patted him on the shoulder, hugged him, with tears in his eyes, and said, "Don't worry mate, I am going to marry again soon."

I don't like graduation ceremonies.

Too much circumstantial pomp.