A biologist, a logician, and a philosopher are driving down the road in County Clare..

A biologist, a logician, and a philosopher are driving down the road in County Clare...

They see the profile of a brown cow grazing in an adjacent meadow. The biologist says, "Look, Ireland has brown cows!" The logician says, "No, sir, all we can say for certain is that Ireland has at least one brown cow." The philosopher retorts, "Alas, my fair companions, all we can know for certain ... read more

A biologist, a logician, and a philosopher are driving down the road in County Clare...

They see the profile of a brown cow grazing in an adjacent meadow. The biologist says, "Look, Ireland has brown cows!" The logician says, "No, sir, all we can say for certain is that Ireland has at least one brown cow." The philosopher retorts, "Alas, my fair companions, all we can know for certain is that Ireland has at least one half of one brown cow."

A philosopher, a biologist, a mathematician and a YouTube celebrity spot a cow in a field whilst on their first trip to Scotland.

Upon discerning the brown colour of the cow’, the philosopher exclaimed ‘Aha! My fellows, you see what knowledge we have garnered? I can hereby assert: cows in Scotland are brown!’The biologist replied acerbically, ‘Not so fast, my dear friend. It is safe only to assert thus: there are cows ... read more

Three men are on a train.

One is an economist, one is a logician, and the other is a mathematician.

They are riding into Scotland, as they pass a brown cow.

The economist says, "Look, the cows in Scotland are brown."

The logician says, "No, there are cows in Scotland of which at least one is brown"

The mathematician says, "No, There is at least one cow in scotland, of which one side appears to be brown from this distance"

There are three men on a train...

One of them is an economist and one of them is a logician and one of them is a mathematician. And they have just crossed the border into Scotland and they see a brown cow standing in a field from the window of the train.

And the economist says, "Look, the cows in Scotland are brown."

And the logician says, "No. There are cows in Scotland of which one at least is brown."

And the mathematician says, "No. There is at least one cow in Scotland, of which one side appears to be brown."

So a biologist, engineer and physicist are called to help make a dairy farm more efficient...

The biologist tells the farmer that he should feed the cows certain hormones to make it lactate more. The farmer asked how much it'll cost and the biologist says it'll cost many thousands of dollars. The engineer proposes to make a better milking machine to get more milk per cow. The farmer asks how much it'll cost and the engineer says it'll cost many thousands of dollars. The farmer then asks the physicist how much his idea will cost. The physicist say "It'll cost nothing and can be implemented immediately!" The farmer was astonished and ask how this is possible. The physicist responds, "Now assume a spherical cow....."

What do you call an American linguist, philosopher, cognitive scientist, logician, political commentator, social justice activist, and anarcho-syndicalist advocate who doesn't eat ham?.

NO-HAM CHOMPSKY