Teacher: Why did you not study?

Teacher: Why did you not study?

Student: A year has 365 days for you to study. After taking away 52 Sundays, there are only 313 days left. There are 50 days in the summer that is way too hot to work so there are only 263 days left. We sleep 8 hours a day, in a year, that counts up to 122 days so now we're left with 141 days. If we fooled around for only 1 hour a day, 15 days are gone, so we are left with 126 days. We spend 2 hours eating each day, 30 days are used in this way in the year, and we are left with 96 days in our year. We spend 1 hour a day speaking to friends and family, that takes away 15 days more and we are left with 81 days. Exams and tests take up at least 35 days in your year, hence you are only left with 46 days. Taking off approximately 40 days of holidays, you are only left with 6 days. Say you are sick for a minimum of 3 days, you're left with 3 days in the year to study! Let's say you only go out for 2 days... You're left with 1 day. But that 1 day is your birthday.

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Mexican word of the day: wheelchair.

Mexican word of the day: wheelchair.

Theirs only 1 taco left, so wheel chair.

More jokes about: #Wheel #Mexi #Wheelchair
Got a call that my Grandma only has 1 day left to live...

Got a call that my Grandma only has 1 day left to live...

But I'm still not paying the ransom.

Day 103 without sex...

Day 103 without sex...

My smartwatch thinks I've jogged 3 1/2 miles in the last 12 hours. but I haven't left the house.

Plane engine emergency.

Plane engine emergency.

While on a flight the captain makes an announcement "Ladies and gentlemen we have had to turn off engine 1 and reduced speed. We will be delayed by 1 hour". A few minutes later the captain makes another announcement "Ladies and gentlemen we have had to turn off engine 2 and reduced speed, we will be delayed by another hour and have 2 engines operational". A few minutes later "Ladies and gentlemen we have had to turn off engine 3 and reduced speed, we will be delayed by another hour and have only 1 engine remaining". At this point a passenger shouts out "Oh come one, if we lose the last engine we will be up here all day!"

The brain is amazing, works 24 hours a day and only stops when...

The brain is amazing, works 24 hours a day and only stops when...

we are taking a fucking test