I needed some money..

I needed some money...

So I decided to rob a bottle shop with my Lebanese friend. We agreed to meet around the corner of the shop in a dark alley at midnight and go from there.

I waited in that alley, and my colleague arrives with a bit of sweet pastry stuck to his head.

"You moron!!" I exclaim, "I said Balaclava!"

Finger in the Pie.

I robbed a pastry shop in Lombardyand ended up in custardy

Two men walk into a pastry shop.

While the clerk is busy, on man, Don, reaches behind the glass cover and grabs three pastries and stuffs them in his pocket."See how easy this is?" Don says to John. I've never paid for a pastry in fifteen years, and I come here every day. I'd like to see you beat that."John accepts ... read more

I think I ate some bad Lebanese.

I falafel

I lost a really valuable item after a break-in the other night.

My balaclava was blown off in the wind.

My girlfriend and I like to wear balaclavas when kissing.

so we can make out like bandits

My friend went to Amsterdam..

My friend is Lebanese.

While walking through the red light district,

he wanders into the first house he sees.

He says, "I'll give you $200,but we have to do it Lebanese style.."

The prostitute refuses and so he leaves.

He walks up to the next house on the block and goes in.

"I'll give you $200, but we have to do it Lebanese style.."

The second prostitute refuses and kicks him out as well.

So he walks up to the final house on the block and goes in.

"I'll give you $300, but we have to do it Lebanese style.."

The prostitute agrees and they bang it out,

after the prostitute turns to him and says,

"I don't mean to be rude but, that was pretty average. What makes it Lebanese though?"

My friend replies, "Pay you next time".