I needed a watch

I needed a watch.

So I went in to a watch shop and said 'I'd like to buy a watch please'. He said 'analogue?' I said 'no, just a watch please'.

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A guy came into my shoe shop today.

A guy came into my shoe shop today.

He said, "I'd like a pair of red shoes please." "Certainly sir," I replied. "What size?" "Size 40." Fucking clown.

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I went to the shop to buy 6 cans of coke.

I went to the shop to buy 6 cans of coke.

But when I got home, I realised I'd picked 7 Up.

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I went to the shop today to buy a 6 pack of Sprite...

I went to the shop today to buy a 6 pack of Sprite...

But when i got home i realised that I'd picked 7 Up

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I'd like to buy a bed, please. Certainly, madam. Spring mattress?

I'd like to buy a bed, please. Certainly, madam. Spring mattress?.

Oh, no! I want to be able to use it all year.

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Mommy, buy this puppy, please, buy it!.

Mommy, buy this puppy, please, buy it!.

"No" "Look at how cute the puppy is!" "No Isaac, I will not buy any puppy" "Please mother, buy the puppy, pleaaaase..." "I said no! Isaac, sell the puppy to someone else!"

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A guy walks into a watch store with his broken watch.

A guy walks into a watch store with his broken watch.

A guy walks into a watch store with his broken watch and asks the owner if he could fix his watch.

"We don't fix watches." the owner replied.

"Well... Can I buy a new watch?" asks the man.

"We don't sell watches either."

"You don't fix watches, and you don't sell watches, yet you have watches in the shop window." the man said with a surprised tone.

"That's correct."

"So what do you do here?" asked the man.

"We circumcise people" answered the owner.

"Then why have you put watches in the shop window?"

"What else am I supposed to put there?"

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