Yesterday I lost 100 sheets of sandpaper..

Yesterday I lost 100 sheets of sandpaper...

But I have a rough idea where they are

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I saw my dog walk over sandpaper.

I saw my dog walk over sandpaper.

He said rough rough

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Sandpaper.

Sandpaper.

I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper.

Gosh, I only intended to rough him up a bit.

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More jokes about: #Rough
I’ve been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper.

I’ve been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper.

To be honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.

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More jokes about: #Sandpaper
I'm not saying that the street I live on is rough, but...

I'm not saying that the street I live on is rough, but...

there are so many windows boarded up that the local window cleaner carries sandpaper with him!

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When I was a kid, my family was very poor. My dad had to get a second job in the sandpaper factory.

When I was a kid, my family was very poor. My dad had to get a second job in the sandpaper factory.

Those were rough times.

^(Made that myself. I'm rather proud.)

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More jokes about: #Rough
Geppetto's advice to Pinocchio.

Geppetto's advice to Pinocchio.

One day Geppetto had a visit from his son and Pinocchio had a troubled look on his face.

"What is wrong my son?" asked Geppetto.

"Well... I found a girlfriend but when we make love she complains about the roughness and the splinters. She says she doesn't want to have sex with me as much anymore." responded Pinocchio.

After thinking for a bit the old man decided that the simple solution is the best and says, "Here, use this sandpaper." while handing him a few sheets.

Pinocchio takes the sandpaper and advice and leaves.

A few days later Geppetto sees Pinocchio in the market buying stacks of sandpaper which triggers Geppetto to approach his son and ask, "So I take it your girl problems solved?"

Pinocchio turns to his father and says, "Girls?!?!? Who needs girls?!?!"

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More jokes about: #Splinters