4 Soldiers were coming home from a huge battle

4 Soldiers were coming home from a huge battle.

As they were walking back to their base, one of the soldiers says,

"Oh man, that was the toughest battle of our lives. 5 men against 1,000!"

One of the other soldiers says, "I know right. I can't believe we survived!"

The 3rd soldier says, "I agree with you both. That was the last battle I'll ever fight. 5 men against 1000"

The last soldier says, "Those were the toughest 5 guys we've ever fought."

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I remember what my uncle used to say.

I remember what my uncle used to say.

There we were. Three against a thousand.

Toughest three we ever fought

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What did the Hobbits scream as they were riding the Ents into battle against Isengard?.

What did the Hobbits scream as they were riding the Ents into battle against Isengard?.

Run, Forest, run!

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The Power of Words.

The Power of Words.

A soldier in the trenches of WWI had lost his rifle in a previous battle. His sergeant ordered his troops to attack. He didn't move. The sargeant screamed at his soldier. The soldier said, "Sarge! I lost my rifle in the last battle." Sarge looks around and finds a wicker broom. He says, "Point this ... read more

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Three soldiers come back home from a gruesome battle in Afganistan.

Three soldiers come back home from a gruesome battle in Afganistan.

The army tells them “You will be given the highest decorations, and you will also receive ANYTHING you wish for”The first soldier says “ I want 2 Million dollars” and it’s doneThe second one goes “Damn, these guys aren’t fucking around huh...I want 5 Million” and gets themThe... read more

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I was attacked by 1, 3, 5, 7 and 9.

I was attacked by 1, 3, 5, 7 and 9.

The odds were against me

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A pirate and his crew.

A pirate and his crew.

A captain and his pirate crew would always go out to battle against groups of ships of 4 or 5.

Before he does, he always says to his crew, Someone, get me my red suit!

He would do this before every battle.

Then one day, one if his crew would say, O' Captain, why do you always wear your red suit to battle?

He would respond with, That way, if I get hurt and bleed, no one would notice it.

His crew, upon hearing this, were quite impressed.

The next day the captain went out to battle and saw 100 ships all aimed at him

Someone get me my brown pants.

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