Best 1489 Post Jokes and Puns

I believe i can flyyy

i believe i can flyyy

got shot by the pizza guyyy

all i wanted was some onion ringggss

from McDonald's or Burgerkinggg

I believe i can soarrrr

mom slapped me in the grocery storeee

Even though im 24 I still got an imaginary dinosoarrrrr

I believe i can falllll I tripped on a bouncey ballll

Thought id post this funny jokes. Even though i got no votes.

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More jokes about: #Funny
I'll change my facebook username to NOBODY so that way when people post crappy posts,and i press the like button it will say NOBODY likes this

I'll change my facebook username to NOBODY so that way when people post crappy posts,and i press the like button it will say NOBODY likes this

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More jokes about: #Funny #One #Liner
Do you hate it when people change your jokes a little bit then they get all the credit?

Do you hate it when people change your jokes a little bit then they get all the credit? Kickass this post so much so that we can stop those copy-catting assholes who are too stupid to come up with an awesome joke by themselves. WE WILL GET RID OF COPY CATS IN KICKASS HUMOR. Kickass this to make a change :)

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I hate those posts that say "taking off your bra at the end of the day is the best feeling you ever felt, guys will never understand".

I hate those posts that say "taking off your bra at the end of the day is the best feeling you ever felt, guys will never understand". Guys like it just as much as girls do.

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More jokes about: #Funny #Dirty
Just changed my Facebook name to ‘No one’ so when I see stupid posts I can click like and it will say ‘No one likes this’.

Just changed my Facebook name to ‘No one’ so when I see stupid posts I can click like and it will say ‘No one likes this’.

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More jokes about: #General
Have you ever saw a black/Chinese person if you did or think it's possible give this post alot of kickasses

Have you ever saw a black/Chinese person if you did or think it's possible give this post alot of kickasses

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More jokes about: #Funny #Racial
That awkward moment when…

That awkward moment when…

you say goodbye to someone and then both walk in the same direction..

That awkward moment when…

someone tells you to stop clicking your pen, but you have to click it one more time to use it

That awkward moment when…

somebody is cross-eyed and you dont know which eye to look at.

That awkward moment when…

the guy who discovered milk had to explain to the village what he was doing to the cow.

That awkward moment when…

someone’s zipper is down you don’t know whether to tell, because you can’t explain why you were looking that low.

That awkward moment when…

you wave to someone and it turns out they were waving to the person behind you.

That awkward moment when…

someone isn’t txting you back and then you see them update their status from mobile…

That awkward moment when…

The your chair makes a farting noise no one believes it was the chair, so you try to do it again.

That awkward moment when…

you change your Facebook status to ”single” and your ex ‘Likes’ it.

That awkward moment when…

your teacher is helping someone with their work, and her ass is in your face

That awkward moment when…

you go to a friends yard sale .. and you see the gift you got them for their birthday is for sale!

That awkward moment when…

the someone says ”you two should go out!”

That awkward moment when…

Your at a friends house and thier dog won’t stop sniffing your crotch.

That awkward moment when…

you look up from your phone and the person you have been following around the supermarket isn’t your Mom.

That awkward moment when…

The awkward moment when you attempt to tickle someone’s armpit and end up feeling the moist on your fingers.

That awkward moment when…

that awkward feeling when you accidentally drop your phone in the toilet after using it, then take a deep breath and decide well I got to get it now.

That awkward moment when…

two people start a conversation on your facebook status.

That awkward moment when…

you’re talking to yourself and start to smile like an idiot because you’re so hilarious.

That awkward moment when…

When you start telling a story and you realize no one’s listening, so you slowly fade out and pretend you never said anything.

That awkward moment when…

you realize you used the status bar instead of the search bar!

That awkward moment when…

you post a funny status on Facebook and someone has to ruin it by commenting being all serious!

That awkward moment when…

when you tell a joke and nobody laughs then a few seconds later they all get it…

That awkward moment when…

someone asks you whats wrong and they are the problem

That awkward moment when…

That awkward moment when your dancing, then you turn around you realize someone has been watching you the WHOLE time.

That awkward moment when…

you get hung up on and you continue the conversation alone to attempt to fool the other people in the room..

That awkward moment when…

you do a math problem, and your answer isn’t even one of the choices.

That awkward moment when…

you are in the grocery store and someone is standing in front of the item you need, so you pretend to look at something else until they move.

That awkward moment when…

…that awkward moment after you call your girlfriend the wrong name.

That awkward moment when…

you think you wrote a great status and then nobody likes it…..

That awkward moment when…

you hold the door for someone and you’re left standing there for an eternity because they move at a turtle’s pace.

That awkward moment when…

U look in a car window to fix ur hair.. after standing there for 5 minutes… you see someone in the car…

That awkward moment when…

you struggle to open the door at the Gym

That awkward moment when…

your trapped in the corner of your shower because the cold water came out

That awkward moment when…

the weirdest kid in school is in a relationship and you’re still single.

That awkward moment when…

you mistakenly thought that a stranger from across the room was trying to get your attention and you pointed to yourself and mouthed the word “Meee?”

That awkward moment when…

a guys t*ts are bigger than yours

That awkward moment when…

an ugly person says “I need my beauty sleep” when they really need to hibernate…

That awkward moment when…

you’re scuba diving and you see Adele rolling in the deep.

That awkward moment when…

you accidently send a flirty message to your girlfriend when it was supposed to go to another girl

That awkward moment when…

Adele finds someone like you

That awkward moment when…

you’ve already said “what?” three times and still have no idea what the person said, so you just agree.

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More jokes about: #Funny
Celebrities should have cereals.

Celebrities should have cereals.

Justin Timberflakes

Snoop Loops Macklesmores

Post yours in the comments.

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More jokes about: #Funny #Celebrity
If this post gets 400 likes i will fart on a midget!

If this post gets 400 likes i will fart on a midget!

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More jokes about: #Funny #One #Liner
Before going in for surgery I thought it would be funny if I posted a note on myself telling the surgeon to be careful.

Before going in for surgery I thought it would be funny if I posted a note on myself telling the surgeon to be careful. After the surgery I found another note on myself .”Anyone know where my cell phone is????????”

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More jokes about: #Good #Surgery
Q: What starts with a P, ends with an E, and has a 1,000 letters?

Q: What starts with a P, ends with an E, and has a 1,000 letters? A: Post office.

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More jokes about: #Popular jokes
Half of the people that post on this website need to go back to school and learn how to f*cking spell ... "Yo Cunt Touch Dis ... Stop, Grammar Time" ... Kickass if you agree

Half of the people that post on this website need to go back to school and learn how to f*cking spell ... "Yo Cunt Touch Dis ... Stop, Grammar Time" ... Kickass if you agree

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More jokes about: #Funny #Anti humor
Do you know a corny joke that you think there is just nothing more funny, nothing more corny than,  in the entire world?

Do you know a corny joke that you think there is just nothing more funny, nothing more corny than,  in the entire world?  Post your favorite corny joke in the comments  and see what everyone else thinks of it!

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More jokes about: #Corny
A church's bell ringer passed away.

A church's bell ringer passed away. The church posted the job opening in the local newspaper's classified ads and a man came in with no arms wanting the job. The clergy weren't sure he could do it, but he convinced them to let him try it. They climbed the bell tower and the guy ran toward the bell and hit it with his head, producing a beautiful melody. They gave him the job on the spot. The next day he went to ring the bell, tripped, bounced off the bell and fell to the sidewalk below. Two priests were walking past. One asked, "Do you know this guy?" The other responded, "No, but his face rings a bell." The next day, the dead man's twin brother came in for the again vacant bell ringer position. He also had no arms. The clergy led him up to the bell tower, where he ran at the bell, tripped and fell to the sidewalk below. The same two priests walked up. The first asked, "Do you know him?" The second responded, "No, but he's a dead ringer for his brother."

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More jokes about: #Popular jokes
The Boss of our small company was complaining during a staff meeting that people didn’t respect him enough.

The Boss of our small company was complaining during a staff meeting that people didn’t respect him enough. Trying to change the attitude in the office he came in the next day with a sign for his door it said, “I am the boss”.

One of the employees apparently not appreciating the change posted a post-a-note on the sign it said “your wife wants her sign back”

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More jokes about: #Long #Office
So one day a man posted me an email it read "Wanna know how to get one million dollars?

So one day a man posted me an email it read "Wanna know how to get one million dollars? Well pay 5 dollars to find out!" So I did, and he wrote me an email saying "That's how you do it." TRUE STORY

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(On Facebook)

(On Facebook)

Me: It's quite hot tonight, might have to sleep with an open window!

39 mosquitos liked your post.

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I hate that I have to sit back and relax as I watch innocent people post things with swears to bad disturbing things.

I hate that I have to sit back and relax as I watch innocent people post things with swears to bad disturbing things. Because all it's been doing is inspiering them to continue. In there hearts they know it's wrong, and as they grow up. They'll continue to swear. Especially right in front of there kids. People Make and go on bad websites. Swear on purpose and bully. They think there being good and funny. And All that stuff, but yet. They've been fading away all this time. And It isn't funny. Because maybe one day they'll feel bad. And wish they haven't taken this path in life. It's the grammar people get made fun of for. And the racisim people use. And all that stuff, and it's not ok. No matter what. All it's doing is Wrecking there lives.

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The Boss of our small company was complaining during a staff meeting that people didn’t respect him enough.

The Boss of our small company was complaining during a staff meeting that people didn’t respect him enough. Trying to change the attitude in the office he came in the next day with a sign for his door it said, “I am the boss”.

One of the employees apparently not appreciating the change posted a post-a-note on the sign it said “your wife wants her sign back”

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More jokes about: #Long #Office
Two blondes were talking in heaven, they were discussing how they died.

Two blondes were talking in heaven, they were discussing how they died. The first blonde said 'i had a heart attact, my family has a long line of heart disease, i guess it was my time.' The second blonde said ' oh.. i froze to death, it was NOT the way i wanted to die, its too late now.' 'the first blonde asked, 'what is it like to freeze to death?' 'It is cold, but soon its kinda peaceful, once you know you're dying. What happened before you had your heart attack? 'the first blonde answered ' i knew my husband was cheating on me, so one day i went home early. my car is really old, so my husband probly could hear me pull into the driveway. That give his girlfriend plenty of time to hide. when i walked into the house, it was quiet. i ran up to out bedroom and found my husband watching tv in bed. i could see a glimpse of a bra underneath our bed that definitely wasn't mine, so i immediately accused him of cheating, and i ran around the house to find the hoe. I checked in every room, but when i got to the attic, i had a heart attackthat instantly killed me.' the second blonde moaned 'shame, if you had only looked in the freezer, we would both still be alive.'Post your awesome joke here.

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More jokes about: #Funny #Blonde